Knacker Cracker 10k 1st Jan 2010Posted by Scotty B on January 6th, 2010

Imagine this… 11am New Years Day – Minus 2 degrees Centigrade – Box Hill and my pretty little pink dress and wig…

Starting off with a cold/chest infection, a knee needing strapping because of possible ligament damage and subzero temperatures this wasn’t going to be the walk in the park I had hoped.

With 4 decent ascents up various slopes of Box Hill it was always going to be tough. I reached 98% of my max HR up the first slope, I should of stuck to the plan at this point and slowed down!!

I remember only making about 0.6M up the hill the previous year before having to stop to walk, I was determined to do better this year (at any cost!!) at the top of the first Hill a friendly voice shouts out to me, it was Ben and the little ones. This give me the chance to stop catch my breath. I have the taste of blood in my mouth which tells me how hard I’ve gone in the first km and how I’ve just thrown any sort of strategy out of the window.

A couple of minutes of recouping and I say bye to Ben then off down the hill.. As my watch beeps, 12.5 mins for the first mile.. could be worse. I battle with the Baywatch Life Guards, a group of Clowns and Python esque knights, over taking on the flat only to be overtaken as soon as I hit a slight incline. The hill descended for a good 1km, but before we reached the bottom I encountered the first steps of the day, normally I would of bounded down the hillside next to the steps but with the weather, the ground it was unsafe and I decide to gingerly trot down the steps, one by one carefully. At the bottom on the hill is a left turn down through the valley to the 1^st water station, a 180 degree turn and then up the next hill Juniper Bottom (or is it Top??).

A very steep hill that is only taken at a slow walking pace, inspirational signs are placed at key points up the hill, with a terrible false brow the hill just goes on and on.. As I reach the summit the first of my problems begins, a really aching lower back.. It’s sufficiently painful I have to stop running to stretch my back out.. a combination of jog/walking for the next 5 minutes takes me to the top of “The Chute”. I remember this from the previous year a fast descent down a rough single file track. Unfortunately we’ve been warned of the danger of this section of the course this years… it’s slippery and dangerous.. I plod carefully down the Chute, as we approach the bottom it’s a left handed turn and up the next hill.. with fantastic views over Dorking, Denbies Vineyard yet another hill is taken at a walking pace.. a few of the faster runners who have started after us due to the staggered start over take me, I try not to be too dishearten.. besides they must weigh 60% of what I do therefore they must be at least 40% quicker than me!!

At the top is the turn around by the lookout monument.. Plenty of support is here which is very vocal.. people seem to like my costume

Now comes the part I fear the most.. the steps.. I don’t know how many steps there are but they just go on forever!! As I descent the pain on the runners faces as they pass me going up the hill tells me all I need to know about how hard this is going to be.. suddenly I have a flash back from the previous year and I remember how I hated the steps.

The descent is a mixture of randomly sized steps interspaced with patches of slippery muddy tracks, it’s impossible to see much further than 5 meters in front as I’m trying to concentrate so hard on not slipping over. I one point I do my impression of a lizard on hot sand as one leg slips from under me, I make to place my other leg down just for it to slip away and I managed to place my original leg back down. All this is occurring while both arms flail in a windmill fashion.. it causes much merriment with my fellow runners..

At the bottom of the steps there is a small loop out and back over the river, normally you go out over the bridge and return by the stepping stones, unfortunately the stepping stones are completely submerged so it’s turned into an out and back leg, which in my opinion (and my Garmin’s) adds an extra .25 miles on to the run..

At the bottom on the steps I make the decision to walk as quickly as I can up them (not that I could actually run up them if I wanted to!!) apparently over 270 steps and a height of over 130 vertical meters. I had a simple goal do not stop, if my memory served me correctly this is where I fell apart last year, having to frequently stop and watch other people overtake me.  I was already significantly behind where I had wanted to be but at this point it didn’t really matter.. just getting to the top of the steps was my goal..

Slowly step by step I managed to lumber, and stumble up the side of the hill, one step at a time, conscience of my lower back pains I try to walk as upright as possible which gives the impression I’m Frankenstein’s monster with a very rigid posture, the irregular depth and size of the steps means a rhythm is not possible and at any time, it’s just a case of literally taking it one step at a time.

Good humour and encouragement is given and received by both runners passed, coming down the steps and runners overtaking me..   at some point I reached the top of the steps, down here from here!!! Nope, the path still keeps climbing through bushes and scrubs, it should be a downhill damn it!!! I revert to stumbling from my run like trot.. I want to look good for the final down hill

Before long the bushes clear, the hill flattens and I can see the last 1km downhill section. It’s still frosty and partial covered with snow.. instead of the headlong sprint down the hill I have to be more careful…

I run pass the In-laws who have come to support me.. the sounds of my father in law laughing aloud when he see me in my pink dress cheer me greatly. Just ahead the Knights of Ni are doing battle and running around the finish line without actually crossing it.

I finish in a time that is 4 minutes slower that the previous year, the results tell me the winner was over 5 minutes slower than the previous year therefore I believe although I was slower this year I performed better…

What a great goody bag, a really good technical top, a decent winter luminous hat and soup, rolls and a carrot – Medals to follow..

I would say that this is one of my favourite events, it is also a testament that 80% of the runners wore fancy dress, with several people coordinating to make several really funny fancy dress teams and I saw NO one with MP3 Player.. all on New Year’s Day

I hereby proposal that the BCTTT enter a fun dressed team for next year’s race.. Anyone else interested??